Breaking Free Page 10

Uncomfortable with the memories Flash’s observations dragged up, Hawk shrugged. “Just plain lucky I guess.” He shifted his pack over his shoulder to a more comfortable position. “Did you change position at any time?”

  “Not once I settled in.”

  “I want you to write down everything you saw that night, Flash.”

  He frowned. “I already wrote my report for Lieutenant Commander Jackson.”

  “Well I want you to do it again. But this time I want you to write down everything you can remember Cutter saying or doing in the days before the mission. There are some questions about what happened to him that have to be answered before Jackson will let it go.”

  Flash frowned and his jaw tensed. “All right. What’s Jackson looking for?”

  “Cutter was down before I found him. He wants an explanation.”

  “Shit, Hawk. Anything could have happened to him. He could have tripped and hit his head or fallen. We’re never going to know what happened.”

  Was Flash hoping they wouldn’t find out? “You can go in and tell Jackson that the next time you’re at HQ.”

  Flash swore beneath his breath. “I’ll try and remember what we talked about before the mission. But it’s been over a month.”

  The strain of reading into what his men said, and looking at every word with suspicion, had his gut tightening painfully. Hawk swallowed against the sensation. “Do what you can.”

  “All right.”

  Flash’s sullenness sparked Hawk’s resentment. He drew a deep breath in a bid for patience and reached inside his pack for a copy of the CD the hospital had given him. The small subterfuge he had planned gave him a twinge or two of guilt. If Flash’s findings were different than Lang’s, would it prove anything?

  “You’re good with images. I’d like you to have a look at these and see if you can figure out who this guy is. He came out of Cutter’s hospital room just before Derrick arrived.”

  Flash grasped the disk case. “Will do. I’ll get right on it and call you later tonight.”

  “Thanks, I appreciate it.” Would he be so eager to get on this if he were the one on the tape? If he was, would he try and cover it up somehow? “Have you seen Lang around?”

  “Yeah, he was inside talking with Lieutenant Russell.”

  “I’ll catch you later.” Hawk turned.

  “What happens if we never figure out what happened to Cutter?” Flash asked.

  Hawk looked over his shoulder at him. Feelings of betrayal, guilt, and frustration rose up to color his words with emotion. “We’re fucked.”

  CHAPTER 9

  Zoe laughed as she watched Langley Marks, wearing an apron that read “Fireman in Training”, flip burgers at the grill. His wife, Trish, stood beside him with a small cup of water to douse the flames thrown up by grease on the charcoal.

  Zoe drew in a deep breath of the chlorine-laced air and tried to relax the tension in her shoulders. God, she and Hawk had both needed to get out of the house and away from the hospital for a few hours. Since he’d gone to the shooting range the day before he’d been quiet and distracted. Who had he talked to? What had they said? Damn the Navy and damn this closed mouth policy. She was going to get him to talk to her as soon as they got home.

  Zoe’s attention wandered back to Trish as she pointed at something on the grill with her left hand while the fingers of her right lingered against her husband’s nape. Langley turned to look at her, a smile playing across his wide expressive mouth. An intimate look passed between the couple.

  “Incoming!”

  Hawk’s shout had her looking around just as he hit the surface of the water, his body tucked in a cannonball. A fountain of water splattered the three children sitting on the side of the pool. They squealed and immediately leaped in to splash him.

  Watching him play with the children, her smile reemerged. He was more than good with them. She didn’t want to think about that either.

  Trish Marks placed a glass of ice tea on the table in front of her with a slice of lemon floating in it. “You’re awfully deep in thought, Zoe.”

  “I’m just watching the children.”

  Trish sat down across from her and folded a napkin to act as a coaster. “What’s the news on your sister and the new baby?”

  “They released my sister and the baby to go home a couple of days ago. The baby is doing well. She weighs seven pounds ten ounces, and according to my brother-in-law, Turner, eats like a pig.”

  Trish smiled, her freckled face wholesome and pretty. “That’s great. And your sister?”

  “She’s very sore and moving slowly, but she’s going to be all right.”

  Trish nodded. “That’s good.”

  Zoe’s gaze traveled to the three tow-headed children in the pool as Hawk passed a beach ball with them. “Hawk’s really good with the kids.”

  “Yes, he is. He even babysat with Anna and Jessica one night when we had to take Tad to the emergency room with a stomach virus.”

  Zoe grinned and patted the area over her heart as though it were fluttering.

  Trish laughed. “He’s going to make someone a dandy husband one day.”

  With an effort, she kept her tone and expression carefully neutral. “Yes, he will.”

  “How are you and he getting along without Clara?”

  She swung her attention back to Trish. “Fine.”

  “But--”

  Zoe bit her lip to keep from smiling. “No buts.”

  “But--”

  She laughed. “I bet you’re really good at work.”

  Trish smiled, her eyes crinkling at the corners. “I’ve been told I can get the most hardened gang member to talk. That’s part of being a good social worker, getting people to reveal what’s bothering them.” Her expression grew serious as she leaned her elbows on the table. “I was only teasing. I wasn’t trying to pump you for information.”

  “Sure you were.” Zoe shot her a look of understanding. “You’re obviously close to Hawk and are trying to look out for him. Getting people to talk is part of my job, too. Sometimes it’s easier to get other people to talk, than it is to talk about yourself.”

  “But--”

  She was silent for a moment as she studied the other woman’s face. “I’m waiting for someone who’ll look at me like Langley does you.”

  Trish’s blond brows rose. “The fellow in the pool might be a candidate.”

  Zoe looked back at the pool and caught Hawk looking at them, his pale gray eyes light against his tanned skin. His hair, slicked to his skull with water, looked as dark as a seal’s pelt. He flashed a smile. A beach ball bounced off his head and he keeled over in the water as though the ball had knocked him out.

  High-pitched squeals of glee rang out as the children descended on him. For a moment it was questionable whether the youngsters were trying to rescue him or drown him until they started to tug him to the side of the pool.

  Trish rose, her attention on Langley at the grill. “Why don’t you join Hawk and the kids in the pool while I see if I can avoid a culinary disaster at the grill? I’ll loan you a suit. It’s hot as Hades out here.”

  Anxiety shot through Zoe and she shook her head, though sweat rolled down between her breasts and along her sides. “I’m all right. Can I do anything to help?” She started to her feet.

  Trish shook her head and waved her back down. “Everything’s taken care of since you two brought most of the meal already prepared.”

  Once again she wondered about the invitation. Had Langley called Hawk during his therapy? Or had Hawk called him?

  Every evening since he’d kissed her, she swung back and forth between anxiety and excitement as she anticipated being alone with Hawk. And each evening she’d tried hard to ignore the disappointment and hurt that lingered at his eagerness to spend the evening with friends, and now Langley and Trish.

  God, she was pathetic. Lusting, longing, for a guy completely wrong for her. He wore a uniform, was an expert at hand to hand combat, weapons, exp
losives, and several other things she didn’t have a clue about. And he could be shipped out of the country at a moment’s notice. And he’d probably run the other direction if he ever once caught a glimpse of her scars or her leg.

  Or would he? If he didn’t run like every other man, what then? Would she become a clinging, love-starved ninny willing to put up with months of separation and uncertainty for the intermediate bouts of celebratory sex that would follow every time he came home? And how long would it last once he saw some other woman who had two beautiful undamaged legs and no scars?

  Fear gripped her by the throat, as powerful as the longing twisting her stomach into knots. She flinched at the familiar pain that pulled at her leg as she hugged it to her chest. She couldn’t even outrun the threat of so many possibilities. But she couldn’t embrace them either. She closed her eyes trying to suppress the painful ache her thoughts triggered.

  She was probably reading more into the kiss than he’d intended. She was agonizing over things her overblown imagination was creating. Otherwise he would want to spend evenings alone with her instead of inviting over friends or beating a quick retreat to the Marks’ backyard.

  Had he read what she was thinking in the way she had acted? Had she totally misread the entire situation? Was that why he had found a way to avoid being alone with her? God, how embarrassing to be the recipient of someone’s unwanted interest and have to live in the same house where you couldn’t avoid them.

  She opened her eyes as she became aware of the lessening glare of the sun through her eyelids.

  Langley stood beside her. “You okay, Zoe?”

  She forced a smile to her lips though bile rose in her throat. “Yes, I’m fine.”

  “Just thought I’d warn you, a couple of the guys and their dates will be joining us. I’ve slapped a couple more burgers on the grill.”

  “The more the merrier.” With more people around them perhaps she’d have some time to figure out how she was supposed to behave around Hawk, so he’d know she wasn’t going to inflict her unwanted attentions on him.

  “Yeah, that’s what Trish always says.”

  She rose. “I’ll go help her add some more lettuce to the salad and see if she needs me to run to the store for anything.” She could use a few minutes alone.

  Langley grinned. “Thanks, Zoe.”

  A few minutes later, gripping a shopping list with attached directions to the store in one hand, and her keys in the other, she opened the front door. Derrick Armstrong stood on the porch a slender, dark haired young woman, at his side.

  “Hi.” she stood to one side and held the door open for them. “Trish is in the kitchen and Langley and Hawk are in the backyard with the children.”

  “Thanks.” Derrick and the woman stepped inside. “This is Marjorie, my girlfriend. Marjorie, this is Zoe, Cutter’s sister, and Hawk’s girlfriend.”

  Zoe opened her mouth to contest the statement.

  “Are you leaving?” Derrick asked.

  “I’m just running to the store. I’ll be right back.”

  “We’ll see you later then.” Derrick turned, and with his girlfriend in tow, disappeared down the hallway.

  She paused next to the car as a Toyota Camry pulled up behind her.

  Bowie stepped out of his vehicle and smiled, flashing his dimples. “Need a ride, sweetheart?”

  Was he the one who had hurt her brother? She forced a smile to her lips, though instant feelings of hurt laced with suspicion seemed lodged like a knife beneath her ribs. “Said the big bad wolf.”

  He pointed at himself with a thumb. “Who, me?”

  Zoe smiled at his expression of exaggerated amazement. “I’m just going to the store for Trish. I’ll be back in just a moment.”

  “Hop in and I’ll take you. I’ll push the buggy.”

  Was it wise to get into the car with him? Unable to think of a polite way to turn him down, she limped to the passenger side of the car and opened the door.

  “Alone at last.” Bowie smiled again and taking her hand in his, waggled his eyebrows at her.

  She shook her head at him. Being on the receiving end of his flirtatious teasing, Zoe found it difficult to imagine him hurting her. But then, all the men were trained to kill, even Hawk. “Heel, Wolfman. If we don’t get back pronto with the groceries, we may find ourselves going hungry.” She withdrew her hand to fasten her seatbelt.

  “I promise I’ll feed you if we do.”

  “Thank you, Bowie. I can’t promise to protect you from Trish though.” She waved the grocery list back and forth.

  “Can’t say I blame you. Trish is tough. I’d put her up against any officer in the division.” He started the car and backed out of the driveway.

  “So how’s Cutter doing?” he asked.

  “He’s about the same. He turns over in his sleep but he just doesn’t open his eyes.”

  Bowie shook his head his features growing solemn. “He’ll pull out of it. He’s tough,” he said after a moment’s silence, but his tone lacked conviction.

  He eased the vehicle to a stop at a busy intersection and signaled a right turn. “So when are you going to go out with me?”

  She studied his attractive even features and killer dimples. Would she have been attracted to him had Hawk not caught her interest first? Possibly. Could she find out if he was the one who had hurt Brett if they did go out? Probably not. It would be dangerous if she did. If Brett couldn’t defend himself against whoever had hurt him, she didn’t stand a chance.

  I’m not very good at the dating thing, Bowie.”

  “What’s to be good at? We eat, watch a movie, talk. And other things if you feel comfortable with it.”

  Her face grew hot and she studied the houses they passed with desperate interest.

  “There wouldn’t be any pressure, Zoe.”

  She struggled to unglue her tongue from the roof of her mouth. “You’re a really nice guy.”

  “God, don’t say that.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because every guy knows when a woman calls you a nice guy she’s going to turn you down.”

  She laughed. “Isn’t it better to be turned down as a nice guy than a jerk?”

  “It’s better not to be turned down at all.”

  She smiled. “I’m sorry. It isn’t you.”

  “Then who is it?”

  Her cheeks burnt.

  “LT tried to warn us off, you being Cutter’s sister and all. Maybe you better let him in on the fact that you’ve hooked up with someone.”

  The words struck her with the force of a medicine ball to the chest. “He warned you off?”

  His brows shot up and he turned his head to look at her. “Well, it was worded as a suggestion, but the gist was clear.

  “I see.” Her earlier hurt slid right into a deep anger flushing her cheeks with heat and making her feel as though her ears might blow off her head. The idea of accepting a date with Bowie flitted through her mind, but it would just complicate things. Pay back seemed so petty, too.

  “If you haven’t hooked up with anyone---”

  Despite her anger, she forced a smile. “You keep your eye on the prize and you never give up.”

  “Hooyah.”

  She shook her head. “It wouldn’t be fair to you. You deserve to be a first choice, not a substitute.”

  “Who is this fool?”

  A bark of laughter escaped before she suppressed it. “I’d rather not say. I’m not even sure he knows I’m interested, and I’d like an opportunity to work my way up to cluing him in.”

  His warm, chocolate brown eyes held a smile. “I have to tell you this shy stuff you got going on brings out all my big, bad, male protective urges. If this guy doesn’t do right by you, you just let me know.”

  Could this all be a con? Could he be that good at hiding another personality behind all his charm? “Thanks. I’ll keep it in mind.”

  Making a right hand turn, he pulled into the grocery store parking lot and whipped
into an empty slot. He removed the key from the ignition and turned to look at her. “After I’ve cleaned his clock, you can give me a shot at that date.”

  The need to come straight out and ask him about his involvement was right on the end of her tongue. Was she looking into the face of a man who could betray one of his teammates?

  Studying his open gaze, she just couldn’t believe it. She had nothing to go on but instinct, and every instinct she had said Bowie wasn’t involved. But could she trust her intuition when Hawk couldn’t trust his?

  “We'd better get this shopping done and get back."

  He nodded and flashed his sexy grin. "Let's do it."

  She shook her head at his continued flirtation and exited the car.

  "Hooyah." She heard the word from inside the car.

  CHAPTER 10

  All the way back from the store the questions burned on the tip of Zoe’s tongue. She had to ask him. Her heart beat high in her chest and she couldn’t seem to get enough air into her lungs.

  Bowie parked the car in front of the Marks’ house and released his seat belt, but didn’t move to get out of the car. “It isn’t Derrick, is it?” He rested his hands on the steering wheel, then ran his fingers over the rubber casing that covered it.

  Zoe eyed him, confused.

  “Derrick’s not the one you’ve hooked up with, is he?”

  “No. It isn’t Derrick. He’s already got a girl friend. I just met her a few minutes ago.” Zoe gestured toward the house.

  The tension in his expression relaxed. “I didn’t have anything to do with Brett’s injury, Zoe.” He leaned back in the bucket seat and rested his hands on his thighs. “Maybe you should ask Derrick about Cutter.”

  Zoe studied Bowie’s face. Was he saying he’d witnessed something between Brett and Derrick?

  He gripped the steering wheel and turned it. “If anyone knows anything about Cutter, it will be Derrick.”

  The rumble of a powerful engine growled and Zoe glanced over her shoulder. A bright red Porsche glided into the slot behind Bowie’s Toyota.

  “Jesus! That’s Flash,” he breathed.

  Zoe swung out of the bucket seat with a practiced grip on the doorframe. Bowie, his cheeks flushed with excitement, popped out of the car and started circling the Porsche like a shark circling prey.